It’s been a long time since I put pen to paper.. and a lot has happened, but the most exciting for me now is ….. drum rolls, please…. Ring diaries makes a year today on Family TV, and that takes me back to that first recording

Ring diaries is a marriage show airing on Family TV every Saturday at 6pm, ( started out on Wednesday at 9pm but we shifted to this to accommodate more people ) it’s where we talk about anything and everything to do with marriages. We bring you real people sharing real experiences.

This started as a simple conversation, and we saw it materializing, but it didn’t all come as easy

The fear I had of hosting a show, the wonders of where the guests would come from, as for the topics God…, how would I hold the conversations, well well.. a year later and it’s all history.

I didn’t want to record in the studio because truth be told we wanted to have a cozy conversation, so we looked for a place until we decided to use a church in Ntinda, with its black background we first toyed with the fact that it was too dark, yet the video people thought it was okay and given that we didn’t know what we wanted, we went with the experts opinion .

One thing I have come to learn over time is for every stage of life, God places someone to help you along and for this it was my dear friend Teddy Mugeni.. God girl is simply organised, detailed and took the show under her wings and produced the show effortlessly. She makes it all easy and makes me look good.

The first episode was with two close friends who would go to the end of the earth for me, Samuel Kisakye and Grace Onapa. I mean they allowed to be my guinea pigs( for lack of a better word)

I threw them in the deep end and I watched them pull off a wonderful episode about the Vows we make on our wedding day.. they were able to work with a nervous host and made it all so easy and made me think it was all possible. You can watch that show here (https://youtu.be/dN3z4zMrLRs?si=bbWS2jaVkKxg37fE )

But before the show, honestly I panicked and as if God was showing me to simply trust Him, my go to person for strength was so busy, I called non stop to no avail, I even called my next go to person, then the next and the next all to no avail and God was simply saying am enough.. and we started

After the first half and with a great team of production and my dear guests, the shivers went, and I was able to settle and have a great show…

From there we just went on a roll coaster of shows, different topics ranging from spicing marriage, trust in marriage, handling conflict, inlaws, addiction in marriage, finances ,parents marriages and many more and its always been interesting, from inviting the guest, choosing the topics, preparing for the show and hearing people share their stories and experiences is simply beautiful. To all my guests, I am grateful for the time and being able to share your lives with my viewers. Some of the shows are here, and you can watch more on Family TV channels

To start a new year.. for every show that is to be aired, we will have a brief write up before it’s shows and let’s go have ourselves great marriage..

I travelled with a few people recently and the conversation about men came up, we had 3 in the car so I mean they were sure they could win this against the two women hooo they were wrong the women insisted all men were bad and any time a woman hurts a man its for all the men that have ever hurt a woman

So one asked if it was fair that they be punished for the sins of other men and the answer was a definite yes, a man always has a fault so they deserve what is coming to them anyway . But truth be told who doesn’t have a fault, who says women are saints, being the weaker sex doesn’t mean we are better, so we need to cut the men some slack and up our game

Yes you watched your father batter your mother, you watched him get women left and right but that doesn’t mean your husband will do the same , we put up fences before we even get married and it bothers me.. why are our counsellors putting their experiences on young girls going in for marriage, you are spoiling the joy they should have simply because your marriage didn’t turn out right, I was with a bride once and the matron told her keep your money away from your husband, men are bad, mine took my money and married another woman

Don’t get me wrong men can be brutal but imagine this little girl going to a marriage with your burdens from your marriage , how will the man ever measure up, how will he start this marriage when he is already a suspect. Remembering he had no one to talk to him at all because guess what he must figure things out by himself i mean he is a man ..

The plight of the boy child needs attention, they become men that have no guidance and then disturb society, what if we got up to help, maybe and only maybe we would have better husbands , better bosses and better fathers

Am pained by the realities in our society , a friend lost a finger to a bite from his wife, another got burnt with hot water by the wife and nothing is done, but God forbid it was the man doing that, all hell would break loose . Can we help these men, can we stand with them to become better by taking their concerns seriously. The Dna issue came out and I thought finally men would get justice, for so long women have had children with other men even when married and what hurts is they have them with the husbands brothers, best friends and on some worse scenarios with their fathers but imagine what most people said ( including me at first) men deserve it so we went back to normal as men looked at our children wondering who isn’t theirs but again they can’t dare speak out.

Can we stand up for the men, can we defend them for once, can we believe them when they say the woman came onto him and he obliged out of fear .

I have been thinking about men ,who prepares them for marriage and why are they left out and yet they are expected to be the heads, the vision bearers and the spiritual heads of the home

Recently I met a couple, the man had come to me first telling me how his wife was beating him, I actually laughed at him because honestly I knew it must be a joke, I knew the lady she was humble graceful and loving, there was no way she could beat anyone let alone the tall husband. The look in his eyes stopped me in my track, he was actually serious..

Men are being battered but they fear to speak out and those that can dare speak out no one will believe them or they are considered weak but how do we expect them to lead when they are dying inside, as I looked deeply into the lives of the men I came to understand why they are terrible bosses, they exert authority at work because its the only place they actually can then coil when they get home.

They are taking it out on the wrong people and in the wrong places, men have ego and once it’s stepped on they become the worst version of themselves. Don’t quote me wrong they have their flaws( quite many at that) but shouldn’t we say something about the way they are being wronged, can society arise for the sake of men the way it has for the women

In the last 3 months I have attended several women only workshops and boy or boy you feel energised and built up, you can conquer the world but then I kept wondering you are sending these enabled women out to men that have low esteem to do what… can we arise for the men, they are meant to be the heads but they are not taught how to be the head.. they are supposed to be the vision bearers but what if they actually have no vision, do you see how the women will get lost because they are following someone who doesn’t know where he is going.

My pain for the men keeps me awake , I tear for my boys if nothing changes, if men are bundled up as cheats, as liars and many other names but no one stands out to understand why they do these things then the cycle won’t end .. men are belittled at home so when he finds a girl that treats him as a king he will cheat because he longs for that( am aware some cheat for no reason at all but the fun of it) but for the sake of that one who wouldn’t if he is treated right let’s stand up, let’s arise and do something about the boy child

To be continued…

Many a times am asked why I do things the way I do, why I want to go an extra mile for anyone that needs it and more so if you are my friend or family or friends family.

I have been called wierd by some that don’t understand me, others think I must have a motive whereas some think and call it Kajanja

Lately I believed people that I was doing too much, you have to think about yourself I was told and the last one that made me desire to change was … you went all that way as if you were the only option available. Honestly that was the last straw for me , I need to change, I need to get well from this kajanja disease

I tried to look the other way when I heard someone was unwell , I even was unavailable one day for someone that needed me but it ate at me, I felt I had disappointed someone and myself but its what needed to be done

I went on with this for over a month and it all seemed okay, I was without kajanja and life was moving on until I heard a voice so clear..

Why did you stop doing the things I told you to? Why did you listen to people instead of Me , I healed you so that you make life easy for anyone that needs it. Then it all came back to me

Am not a stranger to hospital beds, I have had my fair share of tests, MRI, ECHO, ECG and so many more, I had moved to so many hospitals, but now I was well and my healing never came from any of them it came from God. After all had failed He came through for me, in the coldness of the Mri room when I was scheduled for an operation on Monday He healed me.

But my healing wasn’t my own, it was to bring healing to others and here I was letting peoples words get me off my course..from that day I woke up, I will run around, I will do whatever I can for Him as long as I have breath.

I do all I do with strength that can’t be my own, I will run around all day and not be the tired I should be simply because He renews me.. recently a friend asked me why after all I had done that day I looked fresh and I had no answer but clearly He refreshes .

And this made me realize many times we stop doing something because a person feels its not nice , or start doing because another has said something else.. but who is your audience, when we start working for the audience of one ,the one who truly called us then we will be happy regardless of what the world says 😉.

Mother…..
I miss You
Today, I looked at your Granddaughter
She looked beautiful,strict and focused
Your grand sons are becoming fine young lads
Am really proud of the strides that we have accomplished

I miss You
11 mother’s days down through time
I can’t say in happy mother’s day
For you rested in Power
You left the world

I miss You
The Great food moments out of every meal
The Big heart that raised awesome souls…in dozens
The unceasing prayer for everything that concerned me
The undisputed support and partnership

I miss You
For if your were today
My enemies would have to Puch through you to me
My accomplishments would have a marketing manager
My Wife would have a Rock

I mis You
And Today,,, because you were
I celebrate all the mother’s that live
Your daughter… that I Clive
For the Awosmeness that they Give

Happy mother’s Day